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The 25 WORST strikers in Liverpool history

By Russell Hughes

Mario Balotelli, Liverpool (Photo by Stu Forster/Getty Images)
Mario Balotelli, Liverpool (Photo by Stu Forster/Getty Images) /
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WARRINGTON, ENGLAND – DECEMBER 19: Former Liverpool FC Manager Kenny Dalglish leaves after giving evidence at the Hillsborough Inquest at the specially adapted office building in Birchwood Park on December 19, 2014 in Warrington, England. The new inquest hearing was ordered two years ago when the High Court quashed the original accidental death verdicts that had stood for more than 20 years. The Hillsborough disaster occurred during the FA Cup semi-final tie between Liverpool and Nottingham Forest football clubs in April 1989 at the Hillsborough Stadium in Sheffield, which resulted in the deaths of 96 football fans. (Photo by Dave Thompson/Getty Images)
WARRINGTON, ENGLAND – DECEMBER 19: Former Liverpool FC Manager Kenny Dalglish leaves after giving evidence at the Hillsborough Inquest at the specially adapted office building in Birchwood Park on December 19, 2014 in Warrington, England. The new inquest hearing was ordered two years ago when the High Court quashed the original accidental death verdicts that had stood for more than 20 years. The Hillsborough disaster occurred during the FA Cup semi-final tie between Liverpool and Nottingham Forest football clubs in April 1989 at the Hillsborough Stadium in Sheffield, which resulted in the deaths of 96 football fans. (Photo by Dave Thompson/Getty Images) /

Alan Irvine

Not to be confused with former West Bromwich Albion and Norwich City manager, this Alan Irvine was a more successful footballer but didn’t go into management.

Liverpool signed the striker, who had a poor record throughout his career, for £75,000 from Falkirk in October 1986.

There were loads of options ahead of him, and the Scot only managed to make four substitute appearances before moving to Dundee United.

He is also the victim of a cruel practical joke, which is best explained by the folks at Lfchistory.net, who tell the story like this: “When Liverpool’s FA Cup game against Luton was called off Irvine wasn’t told the news.

“He climbed on the team bus in his best suit ready for matchday, not noticing others were in tracksuits. ‘He thinks that the game is on,’ Hansen said to Dalglish. Kenny called for Irvine to come to his seat.

“‘We’ve got some injuries. How would you like playing centre-back?’ ‘I’m not sure, gaffer,’ Irvine replied. ‘Would you more comfortable in midfield?,’ Kenny asked, to which Irvine said ‘Yes.’ ‘Just don’t tell anybody you’re playing,’ were his final instructions.

“Poor Irvine hadn’t still made his debut. The players were let in on the joke and took their seat in the dressing room at Anfield as if the game was on. They were told by Kenny to sort their match tickets out, knowing that would leave Alan alone in the dressing room with him as he was the only one without a ticket.

“Alan was left waiting in the dressing room for some considerable time until Kenny finally said: ‘The game’s off,’ to which poor Alan could only mutter: ‘I know.'”

Poor bugger.

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